Miss Muffet - The Truth is Revealed
by walmers
Summary: This is the first part of the misadventures of Miss Muffet and are from the first packet of long lost papers to be opened. The reader will see that the nursery rhyme was a whitewash probably written by Miss Muffet herself.


**Miss Muffet – Truth is Revealed**

Long lost papers have just come to light showing that Miss Muffet was not the innocent that she has been portrayed. The curds and whey she was eating were not hers but the spiders and she had chanced upon them as she was out walking. The spider who had gone to tell the rest of his family that there was food available came back to find Miss Muffet heartily eating. Miss Muffet, very surprised by the spiders return jumped up, deliberately crushing the spider in the process and spilling the curds and whey.

As she ran she was thinking about where she could go and seeing a wall in the distance she thought she would head for it and perhaps hide behind it. As she drew nearer she could see there was someone sitting on the wall with people standing around at the front. Not wishing to be seen she ran, bent double to the wall. Reaching the back of the wall and wishing to cause a distraction she gave the person on the wall a hefty shove causing a loud cracking sound. There was then a commotion among the people in front who were all in uniform. Humpty Dumpty had met his end as there was nothing anyone could do to put him together again, even super glue failed.

Continuing her flight Miss Muffet next spied a wood on the sky-line and thinking this would be a good place to hide made tracks to it as fast as she could. Reaching the edge of the wood she knew she had made the right decision. The wood was thick and had lots of undergrowth where she thought she would be able to lay low until the fuss about her activities died down. Slowly moving further into the wood she was surprised to see a small house and by now feeling very hungry she thought she would take a look inside. Opening the unlocked door very carefully so as not to disturb anyone who might be there, she realised there was no-one at home when she saw a table laid for three and the chairs empty. On the table were three bowls each with porridge in. She tried the first one which was far to hot, the second far to cold but the third one was just right so she ate it all, in fact it was so good she even licked the plate something her mother had told her never to do as it was impolite.

Looking in through a window while Miss Muffet was eating was a young girl in a red hood. She too was hungry so she knocked on the window to draw attention to herself and started to make her way to the door. As she reached the door it was flung back and Miss Muffet came running out pushing Little Red Riding Hood to the ground and giving her a kick for good measure. Little Red Riding Hood picked herself up and went into the house. Just as she was looking at the two bowls of porridge not eaten by Miss Muffet the three bears returned. They had not seen Miss Muffet as she was hiding in the bushes nearby. The bears were angry that Little Bear's porridge had been eaten. Little Red Riding Hood tried to explain to the bears what had happened but they were in no mood to listen so instead of porridge they made a meal of Little Red Riding Hood, only the hood remained after they'd finished eating.

In the meantime Miss Muffet from her hiding place in the bushes spotted on the skyline the remains of two small houses and one that was still standing. She wondered if there was more food in the still standing house. Moving stealthily away from the three bears' house she crept uphill to the remaining house, she noticed it was made of brick with a thick wooden door at the front. Knocking on the door, she at first got no reply but then noticed that she was being watched from the corner of a window. Still being hungry she went to the window. She considered putting a brick through it but then decided that a more passive approach would probably be appropriate so, making a rubbing motion on her belly to indicate she was hungry and the little pig inside seeing she was a young girl went to the door and cautiously opened it. Unfortunately for the pig what he had not seen was the big bad wolf hiding behind the wall at the other side of the house still puffing trying to blow the house down. Before Miss Muffet could even put a foot in the door the wolf rushed past kicking the door in, trapping the pig behind it. Miss Muffet thought it better not to hang around, hungry or not she did not want to be on the menu.

Leaving the squealing, struggling pig to be butchered by the wolf Miss Muffet decided to lie low in a nearby bean field. This as she soon discovered was no ordinary bean field, all the beans were very, very tall and one was even taller than the rest reaching into the clouds above. Standing at the bottom of this very tall beanstalk was a young man dressed in bean green. His name was Jack. Miss Muffet had never seen anyone like him before and was even more intrigued when he started to climb the beanstalk. Throwing caution to the wind Miss Muffet was up and running toward the unsuspecting beanstalk climber shouting as she went "Take me with you" although, of course, she had no idea where he was going. Startled, the young man turned, lost his grip and fell the 30 metres to the ground breaking his back in the process. His last words were …

The first packet of papers ends here, as soon as the next is opened and read the story will continue.


End file.
